|for kishijoten - fic - Pretend [Michael/Justin]
||[Mar. 31st, 2005|04:48 pm]
Summary: Michael and Justin hang out. A bag of weed is a lot more of an incentive to admit what’s on one’s mind than people originally thought.
Rating: PG-13 (for language)
Michael and Justin were sitting on the couch in Michael and Ben’s apartment, reminiscing, but mostly just getting high. Their respective partners were busy doing work-type things and they were bored. So what passes time more efficiently than a bag of Brian’s best weed? That’s right, absolutely nothing. They knew they were going to get their asses reamed; especially Justin for taking the bag out of the loft, but neither seemed to care.
“So where’s Hunter, anyway?” Justin asked, not really that curious, but they’d covered all the basics earlier when they found out they were both home alone, whilst their partners were working late.
“I think he has a new girlfriend,” Michael admitted, his face scrunching up in distaste, as if he had just walked in on a farting contest. “He said he was going to be out late, studying at the library.”
“At the library?” Justin began to laugh, “I didn’t know people actually used that one!”
“Will you stop it,” Michael pushed Justin lightly with his foot from his side of the couch. “He’s just looking for his ‘happily ever after’ much like some other twink I remember doing with Brian.” He defended Hunter, he had too. Hunter had had it pretty hard once his first real girlfriend abandoned him. And besides, who was Justin to say anything?
Justin’s face turned from blissful humor to seriously sullen in a matter of nanoseconds as he contemplated Michael’s words. “Yeah well, that Twink has had his fair share of experiences and learned enough life lessons to realize that ‘happily ever after’ is for the movies.”
“Don’t say that Justin,” Michael insisted, “It’s been days since you and Brian have had a serious argument, things are starting to get easier for you guys. Maybe your ‘happily ever after isn’t as far away as you might think,” He knew he was reaching, but it wasn’t healthy for Justin to put himself down like he was. Sure in the past he would have wanted nothing more than for Justin to give up, pack up, and move out; but those days were long gone, Justin belonged here, it had just taken him a little while to see it.
“You’re right, maybe one day Brian and I really will get married,” Justin declared with a serious face, and then busted up laughing, his stomach starting to hurt as he keeled over onto his side, burying his face in the sofa cushions.
“You never know, Ben and I did.” Michael protested, leaning further into the soft, well-used cushions. His and Ben’s apartment wasn’t much, but it was more than enough for two, well three really, for however long Hunter decided to keep them. Because when was it ever really how much he and Ben wanted Hunter to stay? Hunter always knew the tricks and secrets to this game. Much like Justin knew the tricks and secrets, himself, when he decided to become a permanent fixture in everyone’s life, except maybe Justin had stumbled upon a few of them in his early blind-love moments, in the beginning.
“Yeah but you guys are different.” Justin admitted, startling Michael out of his revere.
“Different? How are we different?” Michael knew; he wasn’t stupid. When Ben and he had found one another they had both been looking for someone to be the be-all, end-all. With Brian and Justin it had never been that easy, they were twelve years apart chronologically, though not really that distant emotionally, but it was a struggle from the start. And maybe that was why Michael was hesitant to give Brian over to anyone other than himself, and besides his childhood infatuation, he wasn’t sure Justin could handle Brian. Hell he could barely handle Brian and he’d known him for a decade and a half.
“Oh, you know, you guys are normal.” He never considered Ben and himself normal, but up against Brian and Justin, he supposed they were in fact normal.
“We’re not normal.” At least Michael didn’t think he and Ben were normal. But then they really didn’t argue as much as Brian and Justin did. And they were raising a teenager together. So maybe they were normal. “On second thought, compared to you guys, yeah I guess Ben and I are normal.”
“See I told you! Except for one thing—” Justin trailed off; thinking he probably shouldn’t go there, even if they both were high. In the morning they would both regret it, and besides Brian was supposed to come over and pick him up when he was finished at the office.
“Except for what?” Michael asked, not letting the subject drop as he reached over to grab the joint from Justin’s now outstretched hand. Glancing at the bag he was surprised at the amount they’d gone through. Brian’s going to kill Justin, Michael thought, a slight smirk forming on his lips.
No matter what, even if they were both the culprits; the kind of punishment Brian dealt out, was best taken by Justin. Especially since it was the kind of punishment that would give more pleasure then pain, and really now he was starting to scare him. Why was he even thinking about Brian and Justin that way?
“Well how normal is it that our partners fucked? That’s like we indirectly fucked.” It was like a ticking time bomb had been dropped in between the two feet of space separating their now seated bodies, feet stretched and resting on the coffee table in front of them. Michael couldn’t help but admire their likeness in height, the equal length of their legs from their hips down to their feet.
Snapping out of his revere, “That doesn’t even make sense. Ben and Brian fucked before I even knew Ben, so it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t count.” And with that Justin started to laugh, a hoarse sounding laughter that bordered dangerously on choking.
“What?” Michael asked, exasperated. Justin had to be laughing at him, though he wasn’t sure what he had said that was so funny.
“It counts Mikey, it counts,” Justin replied, and leaned over to pull the joint back from Michael. He pressed his lips to the end of the joint, which was still sitting firmly between Michael’s forefinger and thumb, and took a long drag. Inhaling, Justin held his breath and counted to ten, and then exhaled. “You know, I just had an idea.”
“What is it?” Michael asked, raising an eyebrow curiously.
“We should fuck. If Brian and Ben have, and Brian and I have, and you and Ben have, and you and Brian kinda have, then that just leaves you and me.” Justin explained in all seriousness, while leaning over to put the roach into the ashtray. He fell back into the cushions, stretching out into a relaxed position, and sighed.
Michael watched as Justin slowly inhaled the dwindling bit of weed, it was officially becoming the extinction of the roach. He figured Justin was kind of hot, in his own blond way. He had the big pink lips, and the large mouth; the baby blues that got him his way whenever he turned them on Brian or Deb, his hair Michael imagined, was soft and silky to the touch, which seemed an understandable incentive to reach out and touch the fine hairs.
Shaking his thoughts from his head he could have sworn he heard Justin say they should fuck, but that couldn’t be right. How could they? They had partners, but maybe Justin did have a point: everyone had slept with one another, except Justin and himself. Maybe they should sleep together, and then everything would be even. “Wait! You and Ben haven’t slept together!” He admonished. Justin must really be high, Michael surmised; then he leaned his head on the back of the sofa, closing his eyes and taking a few slow breaths.
“Do you want us to?” Justin asked innocently enough, though something about his words made his stomach tighten. It wasn’t even that Ben and he were monogamous, which of course they were, it wasn’t even an issue; he just didn’t think he could handle the consequences of such a fuck.
“It would balance everything out. We’d be like the friends who at some point had fucked one another. And everyone would finally be even; there wouldn’t be any secrets, because we’d all know each other intimately.” Justin seemed to really be getting into the idea. Although Michael was sure the weed was just making Justin an extremely bad judge of character, as well as really horny. Good thing Brian would be along sometime soon.
But why did anything need to be made even? When were things unbalanced? Hadn’t the four of them moved past all of this? Weren’t they all just friends now, couldn’t they just be the ones who never did go down on one another?
Though on the other hand Michael imagined it might be pretty hot, except they were both pretty much bottoms all the way, even if it was rumored that Justin had topped Brian a couple of times, which Michael found incredulous in and of itself.
“NO!” Michael all of a sudden shouted, startling Justin.
“What ‘no’? Are you okay?” Justin asked genuinely concerned.
“We can’t sleep together. I’m sorry Justin, just no.” Michael felt resolute with his answer, like a huge burden had been lifted off his shoulders. But when had he been pressured? It was just a suggestion, he knew that. So why was he getting all worked up?
“Mikey relax, I wouldn’t sleep with you anyway.”
“Huh? Wait, what, why?” Michael was confused, hadn’t he just said . . . “Am I not good enough for you, is that it? Well if that’s the case, then I am—”
“No, it’s not you . . . well it is. But I think I’ll take a page out of the Brian Kinney Handbook when I say: You don’t fuck your friends.” And with that Justin got up and strode across the room toward the apartment’s entrance just as there was a knock.
Michael didn’t think he’d ever heard a sound sweeter than the rapping of someone’s knuckles against the apartment’s wooden entrance.
Swinging the door open, Justin wrapped his hands around Brian’s neck and walked backwards into the apartment as the two kissed like they’d hadn’t seen one another for a few decades, rather than maybe the sixteen hours that they were actually apart.
Behind the couple, Ben could be seen, laughing quietly, as he squeezed past the two making out just inside the apartment and made his way over to Michael with a big smile. “You guys have fun?” Ben asked while leaning down to give Michael a small kiss on the lips.
“Um, yeah.” Michael hoped Justin didn’t bring up their topic of conversation only moments before, but after taking a look at him and Brian he was pretty sure everything would be okay. And then he remembered the bag of pot, Brian’s bag of pot. Fuck! Quickly, Micheal leaned over the coffee table and grabbed what was left of the bag and its contents, and made his hand into a fist, and squeezing the bag tightly. He moved it behind his back, hoping, no praying, that no one would notice.
Justin and Brian finally pulled apart from across the room, and Michael swallowed hard as Brian turned to face him. He didn’t have to look at him too long, he knew Brian knew, Brian always knew.
Brian leaned over and placed a small kiss on the sides of Justin’s mouth where a grin was beginning to form. “What is that smell?” Brian asked, though the lack of expression told Michael more than he wanted to know. If there was any doubt in his mind before, he knew without a doubt Justin was going to get it when the two got home; Brian’s face was smirking, but behind the smirk only the few closest to Brian could tell that Brian was already forming a plot of revenge. Revenge that, thank God he wouldn’t have to bear witness to. Though he suspected he would have to deal with a lot more of Brian’s snarky comments for a couple of days, and as such his punishment would be given as well.
“Nothing. I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Michael said from his perch on the couch, while slowly edging towards Justin’s messenger bag.
“Did I ever tell you Mikey, what a horrible liar you are?” But Brian didn’t pursue it; he knew what Mikey was trying to hide, and unsuccessfully at that. He was just giving him a hard time. The shit.
“C’mon Mikey, fess up.” Michael could hear Brian egging him on, but he wasn’t going to take the bait.
At just that moment Justin disentangled himself from Brian’s arms and came over to him, hoisting his messenger back onto his shoulder, he leaned forward and gave Michael a big bear hug, one that Debbie, herself, would be proud of and wrapped his free hand around the bag.
When they pulled apart Justin stashed the bag in the front pouch of his hoodie, and grinned up at Michael. They both knew Brian knew, but for the sake of argument’s sake, they were going to pretend he didn’t.
Besides, there were more benefits to be had from pretending Brian didn’t know, and them keeping up their façade of innocence, than if they told the truth.
Shit! Michael thought to himself. He was hanging out with Justin too much, he was starting to know how the twink, who wasn’t really a twink anymore, thought. And that was scarier than telling Brian the truth.
Michael walked over to Ben, and wrapped his arm around Ben’s waist as he watched Justin and Brian pretend not to be touching each other randomly to get a rise out of the other, as they walked out the apartment’s front door. With their departure came Hunter, their foster son, who was apparently planning on driving all of them to an early grave, with his teenage angst.
“Hey guys, you’ll never believe me about this girl I met at the library…” Hunter continued to talk as Ben sat down on the couch, clearing a spot on either side of him for Hunter and himself. Well, at least I know he was actually at the library, Michael thought bemusedly, considering telling Justin about it tomorrow at the diner. Then Michael closed off all thought of tomorrow and looked at his family, all seated around him, and tuned back in as Hunter began his description of his make-out session with a red-head from the local public library.